Tampa Bay Food Monster

…eating food since 1985.

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Posts Tagged ‘white chocolate’

White Chocolate Candy Corn M&Ms

Posted by Tampa Bay Food Monster on October 31, 2012

white chocolate candy corn m&ms bag

okay, so if you’re anything like me, you’re just now realizing through a storm of facebook posts that TODAY is, in fact, the hallowed eve. that is to say, halloween. and that means one of two things: 1.) a bunch of disgusting children are going to be trespassing on your property this evening, dressed like FOOLS, or 2.) you’re ready to join them on the streets, “just passing” as young enough to be out there (nobody believes this, they give you nothing). either way, you’re going to end up buying a whole bunch of candy and eating it yourself. and what better time to do that than the day after halloween, when all that sweet sweet candy goes on sale??

so allow me to tell you about one candy you might want to avoid.

white chocolate candy corn m&ms*note: candy corn added for comparison; not actually included in bag of m&ms.

those jerks at m&ms think they can just crap out anything, and we’ll buy it from them. well… they’re right. this season’s disgusting new variant on an original that does not need to be improved upon is the white chocolate candy corn m&m. alright, so we’ve got a lot going on here. first of all, they are yellow, orange, and white, just like real candy corn! they’re a bit larger than normal m&ms, around the size of the peanut variety, but retaining that signature m&m spheroid shape. i also noticed my bag’s m&ms were a bit slimy, but i cannot say whether that was just my bag, or if they all suffer from this gross affliction. eh. regardless, visually, they did it. i get it – candy corn. mission accomplished.

taste… taste is another story.

inside the white chocolate candy corn m&m

what you have here is a densely packed, super-sweet white chocolate interior. the “artificial and natural flavors” they’ve chosen provide absolutely no hint of candy corn flavor (which should be simple – just add honey!!). so essentially we have just white chocolate m&ms, which would be fine if they just weren’t so damn sweet!! bleh. combine with a shell that seems a little thicker than a typical m&m shell, and a greasy slime coating (again, could be just my bag), and we have ourselves a worthless product that becomes inedible after half a handful.

as a sweet bonus, some of the m&ms tasted vaguely of alcohol?? an odd fermented flavor. maybe it was just the rotten caramel apple i ate for lunch, but, if not, this was hugely unpleasant.

so, in the informed opinion of a self-admitted lover of real candy corn (i’m sorry if you can no longer trust my tastes), this candy sucks. it’s not the worst thing i’ve put in my mouth this halloween, but it ranks up there. if you made the mistake of picking these up, do your damnedest to unload them on unsuspecting children – those kids will eat anything.

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Posted in Candy Reviews, Food, Humor | Tagged: , , , , , | 4 Comments »

Nestle Milkybar

Posted by Tampa Bay Food Monster on October 24, 2010

milky bar

okay sooooo maybe white chocolate isn’t strictly chocolate. MAYBE. but it’s still pretty good. it’s not something i’d eat all the time, because too much will make me sick. IT’S SO SWEET!! but just a bit is a real nice treat. and so you can probably guess that a whole bar of it would be way too much for me. well you’d be right.

the milkybar, made by nestle, is simply a white chocolate bar. that’s really all there is to it. when i saw it in the “english dude” section at publix, i was kind of excited… because first of all – candy. but also because it was something i hadn’t tried, yet sounded familiar. i didn’t know what it was, but surely it must have been a wonderful treat! instead, disappointment. and subsequently, rage. hard, fast rage brought on by too much white chocolate.

it was not bad by any means, but it was nothing special. standard white chocolate. somewhat “milky”, i suppose… i mean it melts in your mouth, and it’s a bit buttery. but very plain. luckily it was broken into little sections, so you could have a bit at a time, but honestly, who would buy a candy bar and not eat it all in one sitting? it’s too much to ask! white chocolate is only good in moderation, and accompanied by something else. like a white chocolate covered pretzel. or OREOS. yeaah… those are good. of course, they’re white fudge, not white chocolate. but uh… same thing, right? RIGHT?!

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Posted in Candy Reviews, Food, Humor | Tagged: , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »